Random Thoughts On Recent Discoveries

I like oatmeal. Who knew?

I just want to reinstate I do not want children. HUGE weight off my mind.

I would never live in Atlanta. Ever.
BUT . . . they do have nice peaches.

I have become attached to slippers. I did not realize how much so until I nearly caused a security breach in DFW the other day. After clearing security and I took a seat at Gate 15 to put my shoes back on. I am not used to carrying a carry-on bag because I just don't like to jack with it, but to avoid paying a surcharge for my primary bag being overweight, I had to borrow a bag from Anne we affectionately refer to as Brownie. Anyway, I put my shoes back on and headed toward the Texas Souvenir store to purchase the traditional "Don't Mess With Texas" bumper sticker. While I was shopping around, I heard this announcement: "would the passenger with the brown bag with the pink bunny slippers inside please claim it at the security checkpoint at Gate 15. This is the final announcement." At first I thought 'cool' because I have a pair of pink bunny slippers. Then, I immediately thought "Shit!". When I got to the Security checkpoint, I told the lady about my bag and I was met with laughter and applause. Weird. On the leg to Atlanta, there was this guy that told me they were thinking about shutting off the Terminal due to someone that left a bag with some bunny slippers in it at the gate. Who wears bunny slippers?
My thought was 'You son of a bitch. Don't you dare talk bad about my bunny slippers in front of me. I love those'

My best qualities are my thoughtfulness and generosity. I don't have much else to offer. You'll either like it or you won't. If you don't, then fuck you. I guess my sweetness is a pretty good quality too, come to think of it.

I love pain killers. You do too. If you say you don't, it's because you are in denial.

If there is anyone out there that can score me some airplane soap, please do so. It smells nice and leaves your hands silky smooth.

I really don't want to work anymore. I just want to have fun.